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'We are here to honor our loved ones': Families share stories of suicide, gun violence

Twelve organizations were represented at the event, many offering mental health and crisis intervention services. (Nadia Kusiima/WUFT News)
Twelve organizations were represented at the event, many offering mental health and crisis intervention services. (Nadia Kusiima/WUFT News)

Editor’s note: This story includes the mention of suicide and its impact on a community. If you or someone you know is having suicidal thoughts, you can reach the national crisis hotline at 800-273-8255 or by dialing 988.

Amanda Goldsmith has seen the face of death.

At age 17, she was stalked by an older man and shot in the back. She flatlined. She survived with physical scars that she speaks about as a survivor.

“The community that I have found – the support, the resources are incalculable,” she said.

At age 24, she lost someone close to her also by gun violence. Her partner’s 18-year-old brother died by suicide.

In each incident, a gun was involved.

Goldsmith joined the Alachua County chapter of Moms Demand Action two years ago. She said she joined to be a part of a community that understood what it was like to be a survivor.

It’s been 18 years since her partner’s brother was shot. Goldsmith said she has channeled her grief into advocacy for stronger gun regulations as an Everytown Survivor fellow and a volunteer with Moms Demand Action, a national movement that advocates for public safety measures to reduce gun violence.

Amanda Goldsmith, standing at the BE Smart table. BE Smart is a campaign that advocates for secure gun storage for child safety. (Nadia Kusiima/ WUFT News)
Amanda Goldsmith, standing at the BE Smart table. BE Smart is a campaign that advocates for secure gun storage for child safety. (Nadia Kusiima/ WUFT News)

The Alachua County Crisis Center will host a vigil on Nov. 23 to honor the loved ones lost to suicide in the Gainesville community. It follows the Nov. 2 Gainesville Out of Darkness community walk to educate others about suicide and support those who have been affected by suicide.

Goldsmith attended the walk to raise awareness about gun violence and those affected by gun suicide. She, along with other members of the chapter, shared information about a program, Be Smart, which provides steps for people to learn how to talk about gun suicide, its prevalence and the importance of secure gun storage.

The walk was organized by a local chapter of the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention and is held annually as part of a nationwide initiative to raise awareness about suicide.

Over 270 participants gathered on Nov. 2 at Albert “Ray” Massey Park for the sixth annual community walk. The walk was open to all members of the community and several interest groups and mental health organizations were present to offer resources and support.

Candi Morris, the chair of the North Florida chapter, has been organizing the walk in Gainesville since it began in 2019. She said it’s an opportunity to support those suffering with their mental health and those who have been affected by suicide.

“We are here to honor our loved ones,” she said.

After her father took his own life, she said her work with the foundation allowed her to speak on his behalf. “Pap Pap," as he was called by his grandchildren, was 82 and in the advanced stages of Parkinson's disease before he died. He was in so much pain, and she said she missed the signs that he was struggling.

“He took 49 pills a day,” she said.

Participants wore "honor beads" around their necks to symbolize the loss of a loved one, with each of the 10 different colors representing a specific type of loss. (Nadia Kusiima/WUFT News)
Participants wore "honor beads" around their necks to symbolize the loss of a loved one, with each of the 10 different colors representing a specific type of loss. (Nadia Kusiima/WUFT News)

He died in 2015. Four years later, Morris began volunteering her time to organize the walk and other events, lead classes and engage with the community.

Each year, she works alongside a group of volunteers to plan and prepare for the walk. She said most of the 35 volunteers involved this year “have been affected by suicide in some capacity.”

She said this includes people who have lost a loved one to suicide, struggled with suicidal thoughts or tendencies or lived through an attempt.

According to Laura Shannonhouse, an associate professor at the University of Florida, anybody could be at risk of suicide.

“People die in isolation,” she said. “They do not die when they are connected to someone else.”

Shannonhouse trains counselors and psychologists in suicide intervention. She said one of the components of the suicide intervention process is asking clearly and directly about suicide.

“A small dose of sincere connection can save lives,” she said.

It’s important to hear and connect with people who are at risk instead of trying to fix whatever may have gone wrong, Shannonhouse said. Morris added the goal of the walk is to “break the stigma” around talking about suicide.

During the walk, she read a poem as participants blew bubbles into the air with a bubble wand they received after registering.

“The bubbles floating around us represent lives touched by suicide in some way,” Morris said in her poem. “We remember and cherish all of them.”

Each year, the walk raises money to fund local suicide prevention programs and provide resources for survivors. Of its $40,000 goal, the chapter has raised $32,586 and will continue to accept donations until December.

The funds go toward the foundation’s research and supporting the chapter’s outreach and advocacy efforts throughout the year. Morris leads Talk Saves Lives, a suicide intervention education program, and Healing Conversations, a peer-to-peer support service for those who are dealing with a recent loss. Volunteers who have dealt with suicide loss offer guidance to those who have recently lost a loved one to suicide.

Among their annual events, a campus walk at the University of Florida started this year to engage students and young people in conversations about mental health.

In addition to the health organizations, representatives from the Gainesville Police Department and the Alachua County Crisis Helpline were also present. Morris said she works with the local mental health and crisis intervention organizations to refer people she interacts with to further resources.

She said she also engages with local and state officials to advocate for bills that would improve suicide intervention efforts. This year, she and 14 other representatives from the state presented three bills to lawmakers aimed at improving and promoting 988, the national crisis hotline.

“We want to let people know that we have to treat mental health the exact same way we treat our physical health,” she said.

Nadia is a reporter for WUFT News who can be reached by calling 352-392-6397 or emailing news@wuft.org.